As I was biking by Forsythe (taking the patented "funk-ass way" back), I saw this odd neon green sign that caught my attention. So I paused to look at it. It said "Disaster Preparedness Drill In Progress: Pneumonic Plague Scenario". Of course, the first time I read it in my sleepless delirium I thought it said "bubonic plague". But still, of all the euphemisms you could think of for "bioterrorist attack", plague definitely isn't top on the reassuring nothing-to-worry-about-folks-everything's-under-control list--it sounds so epic. I looked around, half expecting hazmat squads and people in gas masks, but didn't notice anything unusual; Forsythe seemed its usual sedate self.
So rest assured: if the black plague makes a comeback, your phones will still work.
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